Christmas Blues

It is the most wonderful time of the year… or is it just another blue Christmas? Chronic illness and the holiday season can be conflicting. Yes, there is so much beauty as well as love in this season. However, it can also be a reminder of life B.C.I. (before chronic illness). The traditions we can no longer take part of, the foods we can no longer enjoy, and the friends who have left us.

Blue_Christmas

My love for Christmas has always been known. By October, I am ready to begin decorating and listening to Christmas music. Throughout the fall, the excitement builds with every step closer to the Holiday season. This is the first year I am not excited about this beautiful season. I find my lack of excitement frustrating. I don’t feel like me.

Of course, medication change has a role in this for me emotionally. The saga continues as I taper off of the lovely Prednisone. It has been a little over 20 days since my taper. My body is furious. I have begun passing kidney stones again, which landed me in urgent care. I have been put on a miserable antibiotic. Additionally, my IBD is flaring along with my lupus.  Not to mention that finals are right around the corner. I know logically why I feel the way I do, but logic doesn’t ease the frustration.

I know I am not the only person playing tug a war with emotions this Holiday season. It can be more difficult to cope will illness. I am attempting to fake it till I make it, going through the motions. Praying somewhere along the way the excitement will kick in and I will feel the spirit of Christmas once again. I have begun decorating my room though it is a struggle with POTS. I become dizzy as I raise my arms to hang up snowflakes. My cats are inspirationally excited about the Christmas season.

How do you combat Christmas blues?

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Author: Victoria

Welcome, it is an honor you dropped by. I am Victoria. A twenty-something-year-old battling multiple chronic illnesses while learning how to thrive. Chronically Hopeful was designed to educate others and to provide support to those who are chronically ill. Proving encouragement to others is essential to me. I share my health on here. My major illnesses are Lupus, Hyperadrenergic Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome, EDS, Mast Cell, Endo, and Ulcerative Colitis. I want to share my story with you hoping you will experience support; that someone else understands your pain, struggles, and frustrations. God has chosen not to heal me but to hold me. The more intense the pain the closer his embrace”. My faith, as a Christian has sustained me through the stormy waters of the past few chapters of my life. I desire to grow closer to God and lead others closer to Him. I help lead two online women’s Bible studies. I also post devotionals. I am pursuing my bachelor’s degree through Liberty University’s online program. Despite my illnesses, I have thrived in school. I am a member of Phi Theta Kappa Honor Society, Psi Chi the International Honor Society, and Tau Sigma Honor Society. Abby is my service dog in training. I also have three cats Gracey, Fluffy, and Sadie Rose. I am looking forward to hearing your precious story. Sending hugs, prayers, and spoons. Have an amazing day!

2 thoughts on “Christmas Blues”

  1. I’m sorry you are feeling blue this Christmas. That sounds especially hard when this has been such a favorite time for you in the past! I’m glad you are still decorating your room 🙂 I bet it will look amazing when you are done. Praying that you are able to enjoy the good parts of this season, even when your health is in such a rough place ❤

    Liked by 1 person

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