Less than. Left out. Lonely. Rejection wasn’t new, yet this time, it would be less painful to rip my heart right out of my chest. I poured out the emotions, “God they promised they wouldn’t leave me. How could they?”I had spent plenty of time wandering the playground alone or reading my Bible in silence at lunch. I figured shedding the shell of shyness was key to overcoming rejection, to leave behind those times I was uninvited.
Entering into college I felt like I was on top of the world socially. I had my youth group, the teens from the retreat I passionately poured into my high school years, and the girls on my floor. (Of course, finding a guy friend in order to get a ring by spring couldn’t hurt. Just Kidding! If you don’t get that joke go find a kid who goes to a Christian college.)
I was hopeful that even though I had chronic pain I would soon have solid answers to it and a treatment plan. Steroids don’t make life as a college girl easy. Emotions explode pretty much everywhere in a confused mess. Nothing was going as planned but it could only get better, or so I thought. Thanksgiving weekend I found out I had a triple (Yes I have three kidney’s) kidney infection that was severe lasting a total of four months.
I had always reached out to a particular group of friends checking in on everyone. I figured if no one heard from me someone would check to see if I was alive. I desperately wanted to just have a conversation about anything. Once someone reached out it wasn’t in a loving manner, leaving me in tears. From that conversation steamed rejection from a group of Christian friends. I felt unwanted, isolated, and brokenhearted.
It is a few years later as I sit on my bed writing this. My life is anything but typical. God is on the move in my life providing me with a small group of friends who I cherish dearly and like a weirdo I do point it out to them that I am thankful they are in my life. The Lord is providing me with women to pour into through online Bible study, which I am forever grateful for. He has blessed me with the stability and faithfulness of my mom who has refused to walk out or give up. There are many days- even in those ‘safe’ places where I feel less than, left out, and lonely. Rejection is a knife leaving a deep scar regardless the colorful story attached.
Past rejections impact daily life more than we are aware of. Making us self-conscious. We throw up walls and harsh words out of fear. It seems at times we girls take things to heart a bit more.
I would like to personally invite you to an online Bible study featuring Lysa TerKeurst new books Uninvited.
“In Uninvited, Lysa shares honestly from her own struggles with rejection and gives readers concrete truths to combat the lies our old Enemy hurls our way. You can stop feeling left out, because even when you are overlooked by others, you are handpicked by God. You can change your tendencies to either fall apart or control the actions of others by adopting healthy ways to process your hurt. You are designed for a love without limits, a love that will never let go.
With biblical depth, gut-honest vulnerability, and refreshing wit, Lysa helps readers:
- Release the desire to fall apart or control the actions of others by embracing God-honoring ways to process their hurt.
- Know exactly what to pray for the next ten days to steady their soul and restore their confidence.
- Overcome the two core fears that feed our insecurities by understanding the secret of belonging.
- Stop feeling left out and start believing that “set apart” does not mean “set aside.”
- End the cycle of perceived rejection by refusing to turn a small incident into a full blown issue.”
This Women’s online study will dig deep into God’s word, build lasting friendships, pray with one another, in addition to reading and discussing the book.